Soul Food
We need food to get energy and to survive. There are plenty of elements in food like fats,proteins, minerals, vitamins etc. But what is soul food? Soul food is peace and contentment.

I was born in Sylhet, Bangladesh in a practicing Muslim family in late 90s. I grew up watching Meena, Tom& Jerry and Looney Tunes. There was only one tv channel at our house, that was Bangladesh Television, I grew up watching that tv and actors, actresses and models were really modest at that time. There were a few iconic celebrity couples during the 90s in Bangladesh. One of them was Mohammed Faisal Ahsan Ullah and Jaya Masud (later became Jaya Ahsan after marriage).

Mohammed Faisal Ahsan Ullah was popular by the name Faisal Ahsan. He was very tall and handsome with long, layered red hair up to his neck. The couple spent 13 years together and then they got divorced.Faisal Ahsan left media industry in 2007, a long time before his divorce. I was heartbroken after knowing the news about their divorce and I always prayed to meet the guy. I like and respect the guy because of his excellent personality; he is from a well- known family of old Dhaka, Nawab family. His family is a practicing Muslim family. Faisal Ahsan and Jaya Masud got divorced in 2011 and I came to the US in 2012.

I got admitted to a high school in New Jersey, later moved to New York, got admitted to a high school here, graduated and went to college.

During my freshmen year in college, I went to an engagement party of a relative of mine, saw a guy there and fell in love, which is called love at first sight. Let me add something, I wasn’t very religious at that time and I used to pray Fajr(the dawn prayer) later, after I woke up in the morning, I didn’t wear hijab (religious head covers) out of school and was addicted to social media.

I became friends with the guy that I fell in love with and after 6 months, I proposed him! He refused me, his family members insulted me. As a result, I was heartbroken.

In an afternoon in the year 2018 or 19, I was scrolling through YouTube and guess what I found? I found an interview of my favorite celebrity, Mr. Faisal Ahsan!!! There I saw that he was a bearded guy with a moustache! I barely could recognize him. I also found that his family is a practicing Muslim family, his full name is Mohammed Faisal Ahsan Ullah and he mentioned that when he was in 7th grade, he used to recite Surah Yaseen,36th chapter of the holy Qur’an everyday to save himself from getting punished or beaten by his teacher. As a result, you might be might be surprised, he actually was saved from getting punished and beaten by his teacher. I found out from one of his acquaintances that after his divorce, he found Almighty newly in his life. He became very religious again. He performed early morning prayer(Tahajjud) and the five daily prayers, recited holy Qur’an daily.

I felt like, my heartbrokenness is similar to his. So I started following him,quit social media, started praying Fajr on time, prayed early morning prayer, recited holy Qur’an daily, especially Surah Yaseen and Surah Ad-Duha, 93rd chapter of the holy Qur’an and started wearing hijab. My anxiety and depression faded away, even though I am not married yet and the one I one-sidedly loved is married now; it doesn’t hurt me anymore. I just don’t force someone for closure anymore. Surah Yaseen is the heart of the holy Qur’an and Surah Ad Duha is the cure for depression. Prophet Muhammad (Peace and blessings be upon him) was once anxious and depressed because Allah’s message wasn’t being revealed to him. As a result he was depressed and his aunt started mocking him saying that Allah Almighty forgot him. Later, Surah Ad Duha was revealed, where Allah Almighty assured the prophet that He hasn’t forgotten him.

When we go through anxiety and depression, we often feel and hear from others that we have low or weak Imaan(faith). But Allah Almighty tests us irrespective of our level of faith.

One verse from Surah Yaseen that is my most favorite is:”And we created you in pairs".

One verse from Surah Ad Duha that is my most favorite is:”And your Lord is going to give you and you will be satisfied”.

I don’t know if I will ever meet former model Faisal Ahsan, but he played a great role in my guidance, he helped me find my soul food, my way back to my Lord. I developed love and respect for him. I pray and hope that may Allah make us meet each other and may Allah bless him, Ameen.

In Allah Almighty, I found eternal love and peace. In Him(Allah Almighty) love is never lost. In Him(Allah Almighty)hope is never dead. I am so grateful to Allah Almighty for guiding me and sending me the light through Mr. Mohammed Faisal Ahsan Ullah I am also grateful to Mr. Mohammed Faisal Ahsan Ullah for being the carrier of that light that brought peace and contentment to my broken heart and lost soul. If he never mentioned about five daily prayers and Surah Yaseen in his interview, I would never be the way I am today.